Once upon a time, in a land at the bottom of the earth , where people say Cooeee and Crikey and Freakin' in general conversation, there lived a fair princess who had a very ugly kitchen. She and her Prince did not have the funds to make the kitchen beautiful because while she was rich in love, she was poor in coin, and there was always something else that needed doing round the palace that was more important. Upkeep on a three bedroom palace with one bathroom and a double garage is very costly and the palace was in a state of utter disrepair stemming way back from the Prince's wild swinging bachelor days.
The Princess found it very hard to be creative or interested in cooking in her blue kitchen with cedar panelling, 1970's routed doors, and poorly designed layout. That's probably why her baking sucked so bad-not due to a lack of culinary skill, but squarely because of negative kitchen mojo. So dark and dreary was it in the kitchen, that the princess was convinced in days past it had been used as the royal dungeon. The pineapple wall tiles may have been trendy and the height of fashion in about 1963 but they certainly didn't scream style by 2001 or for the subsequent 9 years she had to live with them. She wept every time she had to mop the gross brown tiled floors as despite her best efforts they NEVER looked clean.
Finally she spat the dummy, in a very princessly manner of course, and demanded the kitchen see some action. The Prince got overly excited about this until she explained she was talking about a renovation, not actual action in the kitchen. Deflated, but supportive, the Prince agreed that she had been patient and good and loving and it was time for a payoff. So she and the Prince set about living on two minute noodles and Vegemite sandwiches for about a year so they could afford what became known throughout the land as the Never Ending Kitchen Reno. Many obstacles were overcome in the Year of Eating Noodles, and after much planning, dreaming and endless choice making they were finally ready to start slaying dragons, metaphorically speaking.
Throughout the process the Princess complained to all of Blogdom, her family, her real life friends, the postman, the guy that runs the local deli and random people in the street. Eventually she became known throughout the kingdom as Princess Whiny Arse. However the Bloggy People were super darn awesome about her whinging and supported her through the trauma of no ceilings, lots of dust , 300 pounds of dried leaves falling out of the roof cavity along with an unexploded fire cracker , no floors, no walls, tradies not turning up when they said they would, delays with deliveries, homelessness, delays with the install because the Princess had requested Royal benchtops and not those available as standard, angle cuts that weren't sent with the rest of the kitchen, no way to cook, a microwave and cooktop that were inadvertently sent to Africa by mistake, petulance, and a small nervous breakdown. And just when it all seemed to be sailing along and the finish line was in sight the universe decided to mess with the electrician's van and so Slack Tea Thursday was able to return one week early but it meant the kitchen remained unfinished.
Nothing bad lasts forever, (it just feels like it does at the time) and eventually there came a day when no tradies were tromping through the castle filthying up the royal tiles, or making sawing and hammering noises and the Princess awoke one morning to the realisation that she had a functional kitchen and no men in her Palace aside from her husband. Oh Happy Day! And while the Prince still needed to tile the splashbacks behind the cooktop and around the sink, and do some other things, and the fixit guy needed to build the pantry shelves and install the pesky angle cuts, this Princess is pulling up stumps and pretty much calling this finished.
It's kind of hard to believe this ....
could become this ...
The Princess was deliriously happy because it truly was the kitchen of her dreams. Or maybe because the medication finally kicked in. Whatever.
Oh and Dudley is whisper quiet but apparently the Princess needs to do a tutorial for the Pyjamas Clan on how to empty him and put dishes away. A Princess's work is never done!
P.S. For all my griping, I just couldn't bring myself to throw away the vintage fruit tiles. Look what I found packed in one of my kitchen boxes.
P.P.S. Just a heads up. The Princess hasn't finished the dining room. This wild ride aint quite over yet.
I'm linking up to Finished for Friday because I finally have a finish!
I'm rolling around laughing my head off!!!! Did anyone ever say to you "YOU SHOULD BE ON THE STAGE"???
ReplyDeleteAND.... you do realise that those tiles are probably worth a fortune now!!!!! Retro is so "in" (that is, for all those people not actually living in a retro house with a retro bathroom and kitchen and no built-ins in the bedrooms!! :-)
Enjoy your beautiful, functional, well designed kitchen - it would be wasted on me ... when we built, my builder asked me if I really wanted a built-in gas oven as all I ever cooked in was the microwave! The oven is "as new" 10 years later!
OMG! Your kitchen looks great... I haven't got around reading the entire post... but i'm talking hubby dear into renovating my kitchen too... :)
ReplyDeleteOh those tiles! I don't remember much about the 60's (too young lol! *coughs loudly*) but I'm pretty sure I have seen those tiles before. Glad you woke up this morning your happy regal self.
ReplyDeleteAhhhhh! It is lovely. Pristine and functional. I'm sure you'll be very happy cooking in it.
ReplyDeleteCan we expect more posts about cooking ?
Cheers
Helen
Nothing less than a Princess deserves......very nice......now for the dining room......o Princess Whiny Arse.....I am in awe...:)
ReplyDeleteYippee! It looks great, very similar to mine in fact! We obviously both have great taste. I've never seen the microwave under the countertops before, I like that idea. Enjoy for years to come!
ReplyDeleteYour kitchen is nothing short of fabulous! It's utterly beautiful. I'm so happy for you! :o) Enjoy!
ReplyDeletePS - Sorry I've been MIA from your blog. I somehow lost your link. I'm back on track and can't wait to catch up on all your great posts.
www.seamsinspired.com
Begone Negative Kitchen Mojo, and never again return to the kitchen down under. It is beautiful QIMP. And, btw, is that a Chicken Idol on your counter? Are we worshipping chickens now?
ReplyDeleteOh My!!! Nothing else left to say except that you are now forever in his debt and owe him lots of favours ;-)
ReplyDeleteoh I'm so jealous I'll send you some pics of my kitchen well the half of one I have..I actually went without a stove for 8 years!! I even did Xmas dinner with a frypan & a microwave!! what firm did you get to make yours??
ReplyDeleteholy gorgeousness!!!
ReplyDeleteI think the prince might deserve some action in the kitchen :)
love everything about it --it's so beautiful, new, white, modern, and inspiring!!
I'm reading your next post now about all the cooking you're currently doing - can't wait!!
thanks for sharing!
Noooo.....you must keep the tiles.....they definitely belong in the royal residence. Not sure where yet, but you must keep them.
ReplyDeleteThat is a kitchen fit for a Princess! (Princess Whiney Arse, that is!) It is beautiful! And while I'm sure it seemed like an eternity to you, it didn't seem to take that long from my side of the pond...
ReplyDeleteI guess we'll now see more action from the kitchen than the sewing room.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your 'new' space.
The kitchen looks amazing!! You really have a gift for spinning a yarn there, Princess. I truly enjoyed hearing the tale. Love those vintage tiles. Perhaps you can back them with cork and use as trivets?
ReplyDeleteStill laughing! Can't wait to hear about the masterpieces you will cook now :)
ReplyDeleteA Royal Kitchen indeed! I was confused by the first photo, thinking it was an AFTER, but the sparkling beauty appeared and Princess Whiney Arse needs a new name. Baking Queen?
ReplyDeleteFabulous! It's all so white and shiny and sparkly and bright. :-) A showcase indeed!
ReplyDeleteMaybe the Prince should get some action in the new kitchen. ;-)
ReplyDelete(Sorry, I couldn't help myself!)
OM Freakin goodness, that is a piece of beauty. You lucky, lucky thing, it must be so worth the saving and the time to get it all done. It is absolutely beautiful.
ReplyDeleteIf you come out one morning and find it gone you know I popped over and ripped it out with my bare hands (and teeth) and its now here across the ditch. Green is not becoming on me you know.
OH MY GOD!!! Nuff said!
ReplyDeleteSo, Ms. P....whats for dinner tonight?
ReplyDeleteWhat a great kitchen! It took less than a month from when you started demo until now! That's practically unheard of in the states. Now it's time to cook up some hot stuff for you and the Prince!
ReplyDeleteHooray! It is so bright and shiny and beautiful and white. And I love you named the dishwasher Dudley.
ReplyDeleteYou ought to frame and hang the fruity tiles as remembrance to kitchens past.
xo -E
P.S. I LOVE your awesome button!
Been holding onto this post in my google reader until I could read it in it's entirety, undisturbed....so I can now say "YAY! It's gorgeous!" Your patience and perserverence has paid off! I know you will enjoy it!
ReplyDeleteThat is well worth the drama! Your kitchen is so very loverly.
ReplyDeleteIt's absolutely beautiful, and I'm sure it was all worth it (now that it is over).
ReplyDeleteIt came out lovely, Mrs P. Now, you can keep it looking that nice. (The princess didn't think about that, now did she?) Lane
ReplyDeleteGorgeous! What a beautiful new kitchen you have!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laugh...we're just redoing our outside walkway and I'm freaking out.