Friday, May 11, 2012

Favourite Things Friday






I slept in this morning....it was practically morning tea time by the time I got up. Which is kind of cool since it is my day off but is kind of sucky because now my whole day is out of whack. I'm theoretically running about 3 hours behind with everything. Including this post. 


Originally when I drafted this post this morning there was a short  paragraph right here that was full of grizzling about my week. When I read it back I realised that this post is all about happy things , so I took it out. It would have been ironic to leave it in don't you think? Would that have made this post a technical oxymoron?

My favourite thing this week is a conversation I had with Miss P last weekend and the outcome of that chat mid week. 

Miss P was talking to me last Saturday about some of Little P's recent behaviours. What he'll eat today he won't eat tomorrow. He may just tip his plate on the floor  for kicks(usually when it's something hard to clean up , like spaghetti) He won't sit for longer than 12 seconds anywhere. He goes into melt down at the drop of a hat when he doesn't get something immediately. He'll become hysterical when Grandpa drives Bella's car.  He'll make a big deal out of having two specks of dirt on his hands but is happy to walk around with three foot booger strings hanging out of his nose and refuse to let you wipe them off. He'll touch things he knows he shouldn't touch , the word "no" has become his absolute favourite but only if it's coming out of his mouth and he has a love/hate relationship with everyone and isn't shy about telling you when you're not in favour for that 3 minute period. 

So Miss P and I  had a chat about why Little P does some of the things he does.    This stuff is my bread and butter. I have conversations like this with other people at least three times a day in my work life. And I often use an example to illustrate what I'm trying to say.

So I explained to Miss P that she has to imagine Little P is a cup. He's learning things all the time. Every experience, every movement,  every interaction, every emotion he has every day goes into the cup to be emptied into different parts of his brain when he goes to sleep at night so he can store it away and bring it out to use another time. That's how kids learn stuff and retain knowledge. 

But sometimes the cup gets full or something goes into the cup during the day  that doesn't make sense or that can't wait until night time to be sorted into his mental filing cabinet, and the cup spills over. He needs help to process what has spilled out of the cup right there and then. And often that's when "Houston,  we have a meltdown" happens. And part of helping a child to re-fill their cup is to stay as calm as possible because if you don't, they're going to take that experience and file it away and it's going to come back and bite you later. 

Miss P nodded in all the right places with only an occasional eye glazing over. I think she got it but I wasn't really sure. Maybe I made her cup spill over.  But I came away hoping that I had helped her realise that when Little P is being difficult to get along with that it's not personal. He isn't doing things with the conscious intent to piss her off. He's just learning how the world works and where he sits in it all.  

Fast forward to Wednesday when I got this email at work with the subject line "The cup is full. The cup is full" 


That's Miss P's new makeup that she hadn't even used yet....And the text that accompanied this message?

"The cup is full! My damn cup is full!!"

Funniest thing that happened all week. And the best thing? She gets it! Or at least she did till he got a bit unruly during after tea play and smacked her with a bottle. I believe he got sent to bed to "process" the days events at that point. You have to know when to fold. 




Today is oven D Day and my oven fixit guy still hasn't shown up yet , which is a pity because I've already mixed 15 cakes to go into that oven. 

23 comments:

Natalie said...

He is quite the Picasso! And that makeup does now look like a painter's pallet. I loooove his expression in the first pic! Perfect!

Suzan said...

Parenting...not for the faint of heart!

Diary of a Flutter.Kat said...

Oh boy - glad that wasn't my make up! Funnily enough I mention something similar in my post today but with perfume.

Kids. Gotta love them and how they "learn"... :)

P. said...

OMG, that is so funny! But before I read the last part, I was thinking to myself that I wish someone had explained things to me in exactly those terms when I had a 3-year-old (and 4, 5, 6...9...) whose cup was prone to spillage. Brilliant analogy!

Sara said...

I've considered doing a FFS Thursday so I can get all my crabbyness out of the way before Friday but I haven't gotten around to it - I suppose becasue I can just opt out of having it be a favourite day, whereas you cant.

And I think telling him to go to bed and process sounds perfectly sensible, though I think the words "think about what you've done" would probably get through a little better.

Anonymous said...

Is Little P going for the smokey eye effect? bahahahaha

SOP

Marg said...

Priceless.
Poor Miss P.
I'm with P, I wish someone had explained that to me when BP was that age.

Marg said...

Oh and look at how many capital P's I had in my comment and I wasn't even trying!

Michelle Ridgway said...

Oh that is priceless he looks so pleased with his efforts. I love the way you explained it Shay and I am going to pass it on to DD who has lots of the "what the....moments" with our Grandson. I did mention on my post why God made them cute!!!

Amanda said...

Got to say Squid had lots of Cup Full Moments in her time, it started well before she was 2 so I had terrible 1's, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,8,9's do you see a pattern here. I think I was more tolerant of the Cup Full Moments when she actually was a toddler now not so much, probably because now I juggle work in the mix I have my own Cup Full Moments a lot of the time. Tantrums didn't start with my son until well into school, its probably because he has always processed everything on the spot, and then files it away in the memory banks to be brought out and surprise you at a later date.
Wish someone had told me about the Cup Full analogy though might have made some of the episodes easier to handle.

thea said...

Since I just got two little ones to bed (#3 might be on his way tonight) .. I am exhausted and my cup is full. Nice favorite. Love the pics of Little P. The first picture is priceless!!

susan said...

My cups has been full all week. I am fully sympathetic to Miss P! My aim is to make my glass full too tonight - with something more enticing like wine.

Jindi's Cottage said...

So, did the oven fixit guy turn up? Are you baking yet???

Kate said...

If she was calm enough to get those pictures, I think she got it. Love those pictures, absolutely priceless.

Larri @ Seams Inspired said...

So I can have meltdowns if I explain to my family that my cup is full and needs emptying? ☺ That's the best photos I've seen all week. It would be my favourite too. You're kinda grinning on the inside though, right? Payback in the motherhood trenches and all that? ☺ Happy Friday night!

Katy Cameron said...

Well now, he's learned that mummy's makeup will give her a meltdown, and that perhaps it doesn't suit him, so the day wasn't a total loss ;o)

Hope my Fix It turned up for the oven

Rachaeldaisy said...

Such a great way of explaining learning processes. Little P is priceless with a capital P! I hope mum gets new make up for Mothers Day.

ANudge said...

LOL! Oh that Little P - how old is he again? Thanks for sharing.

Sarcastic Quilter said...

Holy crap, I laughed for 5 minutes at her text!

Now, what words of wisdom can you give me for a teenage daughter who has decided it is her mission in life to lie to me and piss me off anytime she answers a question? -wink-

Mistea said...

Children teach us everyday! Thanks for sharing your wisdom and the pics of Little P. I sure had a good giggle.
Hope you got to pig out on cake last night?
Enjoy the weekend.

Baa-Me Kniits said...

Beautifully said and you are such a good mum too to sit down and explain the finer points to MissP. It sure does make a difference when you feel that someone is listening to you.
Love those photos...my youngest used to pull that first face all the time and damn it is so hard not to laugh when you are supposed to be being cross! Tell MissP it is good to let him experiment with makeup now rather than bottle it all up and want to wear it later when he is grown up. My Cullen used to always play secretly with my make up and then I let him buy his own, as that's what he wanted to spend his pocket money on. He looked delightful for a while with nice lippy and rosy cheeks but he doesn't seem to have the inclination any more ;-)

Shevvy said...

You sounded so serene and wise during some of that post - until the end when you collapsed with the giggles!

Brenda said...

Hahahahahaha! Darling pics too!